Trying Not To Try

Letting Go

I have always been a trier.

Try harder.

Push myself.

Make it happen.

Of course we all need a certain amount of effort to move forward.

But sometimes that over-trying gets in the way.

It creates tension.

It creates anxiety.

Being overly attached to outcomes takes all of the fun out of life.

This has been really hard for me to overcome.

The perfectionist in me wants to get it right.

Be perfect.

To control.

It feels like smoke and mirrors.

I am “trying” to shift out of trying.

There …

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This one life.

This one precious life.

There have been many challenges.

Obstacles to overcome.

Dreams dashed.

Divorce endured.

A disintegrated knee.

A metal hip.


Physical pain.

Emotional pain.



Lessons of perseverance.

And then there is waking up to the truth.

Everything is for my higher good.

To realize the truth of my being.

 I am the master of my life.

No matter what comes my way it is meant to reveal my higher Self.

It’s about overcoming.


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Training My Mind

Training My Mind

Training My Mind

I have relentlessly trained my body through the years.

Being disciplined has always been a strength of mine.

Eating a vegan diet, it’s all good.

I simply made a choice one day to stop eating animal products.

That’s that.

Getting to the gym every day, no problem.

It’s just what I do. 

But one area that has been an ongoing struggle for me is my thoughts.

I have heard this scripture before a thousand times.

“Be careful what you think because your thoughts run your life.” …

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What Would Love Do?

What Would Love Do


The struggle to keep my heart open.

It’s been conditioned to close.

To self-preserve to stay safe.

To protect my energy.

I have told myself so many stories.

It’s not who I want to be.

But it’s so damn hard to change.

The ego is fighting me tooth and nail.

It doesn’t want to let go.

I know the truth, but yet the hardwiring in my brain is holding on for dear life.

Yet, here I am.

Doing the work.

Asking myself the hard questions.

Looking in the mirror.

In the thick of transformatio…

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Rise Up

Rise Up Image

Rise Up

Get knocked down.

Get back up again and again and again.

Rise up one more time.

Don’t stay down for the count.

Rise up into wholeness.

Rise up into oneness.

Perseverance is the name of the game.

With failing there is no shame.

Fail and fail some more.

Just fail forward.

What is failure anyways?

An opportunity to learn.

Or an opportunity to see ourselves as a failure.

What’s the difference?

I failed.

Or I am a failure.

The only way to fail is to give up.

We are warriors.…

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Being Breathed

Being Breathed Image

There isn’t anything I have to do.

Just be still.

Be aware.

Be aware of being aware.

Sit back and observe.

I am being breathed.

I feel a peace that passes all understanding.

A smile comes over me.

A tear runs down my face.

A tear of joy.

A deep sense of love.

A wholeness that I can’t describe.

The senses want to pull me in so many directions.

My mind can spin with relentless thoughts.

Most of those thoughts aren’t even true.

The truth is I am being breathed.

The best thing I can …

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What the Hell is Qi Gong?


Qi Gong

That’s a weird name.

What the hell is Qi Gong?

Qi means energy.

Gong means skill.

It’s the skill of working with energy.

Who doesn’t need that?

Who couldn’t use more energy?

Positive energy that is.

How about transforming stress into vitality?

That sounds pretty good.

Sign me up.

It’s ancient wisdom.

It’s been around for 4,000 years developed by the Chinese.

It’s the alignment of breath, movement and awareness.

It’s the art of effortless power.

Inner martial arts.

A movi…

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Know Thyself


Know Thyself

I got it all wrong most of my life.

I searched for power in all the wrong things.

I was misled.









External validation.



The search outside of myself led to despair.

We are sold a way of living that creates constant seeking and attaining.

Know thyself.

That is true power.

It’s right there.

It’s too obvious.  

It’s too simple.

It’s profound.

Know myself.

That is where the wisdo…

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Encourage: To inspire with courage, spirit or hope.

One thing my parents were always proud to tell me about my childhood was they rarely had to punish me because I was so good at self-punishment. I am sure that made their life a little easier as they didn’t feel the need to dole out punishment. What they overlooked was all of the harm that happened from my own self-punishment.

I got really good at beating myself up because I couldn’t meet my own expectations. Any criticism that came from an ex…

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Training To Be Happy


Training As a Spiritual Athlete

This may seem like a strange thing to say, but I am going to say it anyway. I am training to be happy. I am learning to allow myself to feel good and notice when I feel bad.

I have conditioned myself over the years to be unhappy. My prior conditioning has led me to believe that when I am happy it makes other people sad.

The truth is I am only responsible for my own happiness. If someone is dependent on me for their happiness, that is on them. They have not done…

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